For my third convention this year, I actually had to travel a bit, as it was much further from my hometown than the last two cons I went to this year.
The con I visited was situated all the way over a little bit after Frankfurt, and we had decided that, for it, we would stay in Frankfurt overnight.
Planning was chaotic.
We ended up paying way too much for train tickets and, in the end, learned the lesson that it would have made much more sense to drive to the con in the morning, stay there for the day and have a room the night after.
.a5f57ed3473774eb.webp)
But Let’s Start From the Beginning!
It all began with the joyous voyage on the USS Deutsche Bahn.
Just kidding.
But yes, we had to travel by DB and it was, as always, just as horrendous as you’d expect.
While the journey from home was relatively tame, we still planned about 120 minutes of leeway and ended up with 40.
Still plenty, just not nearly as much as we could have had.
Punctuality, however, really wasn’t our biggest concern on the drive to Frankfurt.
The other passengers - and a complicated seat reservation system malfunction - were.
We didn’t reserve any seats, so the hassle to get some good ones was urgent. In the end, we had to swap seats a couple of times to get ones without reservation, and had unfortunately chosen wrongly.
It was one of those fateful days where you meet one of those absolute top-notch, A-tier kinda nightmare train passengers.
His nervous tick was smacking his mouth so noisily that not even the full force of my over-ear noise-cancelling headphones could mute it.
On top of that, he had the loudest dad sneezing, wheezing and coughing and did not bother once to cough into his elbow.
Oh, did I tell you he also watched TikToks on full blast with his phone speakers?
Yup.
That was the train ride.
I was also negatively surprised by the ICE train tracks, which run much more smoothly on most other routes.
Seasickness was a given.
Somehow, but likely due to the good company I was traveling with, I still had a blast of a train ride and managed to scribble down some sketches of amazing-looking crustaceans I’d discovered prior on the interwebs.
Did you know there are absolute alien creatures living in the wild depths of our oceans?
I got some serious creature design inspiration from that scribbling session and have gathered enough understanding of Brandon Sanderson’s stylistic worldbuilding choices to man an entire planet solely with crabs and crab people.
Frankfurt: Honestly, Not That Bad?
Tbh, I expected so much worse of Frankfurt station.
I was promised human waste, needles and junkies at every corner, perhaps one or two open coke deals.
I got…
Well, some piss stench and a few hobos collecting bottles at the station.
Much like Munich Hbf, to be honest.
The surrounding area was not much more spectacular.
Upon seeing my bright purple-toned hair, a guy came up offering weed - which in itself is legal now, just the distribution isn’t.
I declined and merrily was on my way to the hotel, five minutes by foot.
This was honestly the best deal I could have gotten.
Three beds, relatively clean and enough space to dump my luggage.
After a brief check-in, neither of us was particularly exhausted - we’d mostly been sitting in a train all day - so we went out for dinner and I was honestly amazed.
The variety of restaurants from any imaginable ethnicity was fantastic, and we literally had to cross the street to get some authentic Chinese noodle soup.
Somehow, we don’t have a single genuine Chinese place in all of Munich, save for an exorbitantly expensive, yet fantastic hotpot.
So one of the first places I frequent in a new city is gonna be a Chinese, preferably Sichuan, kitchen.
There’s something about the unique way spices are utilized in this style of cooking that just speaks to me.
The gorgeous soup with hand-pulled noodles was also able to cure my partner’s stomach ache that had plagued him the entire train ride, and I was ecstatic.
My favorite cuisine and far under the usual price I pay for going out for dinner in Munich?
Yes pleaseee.
Any day.
Thank you!
Exploring Frankfurt, Apparently
Later that evening, I was faced with an entirely unique experience of its own: the absurdity that is exploring Frankfurt city.
The themes here couldn’t clash any more, truly.
You have such a harsh cut between the glistening glass and metal skyscrapers and the cramped, ancient old town that it almost seemed comical to me.
There even was a house that was somewhat cut in half.
One side: sleek modern architecture.
The other: brick wall.
Seriously, who came up with the idea to just build a cyberpunk metropolis around that ancient medieval village?
It felt so unreal. I was wondering multiple times:
Is this a movie set?
The other clash was between the super-modern, well-dressed salarymen carrying suitcases, a selection of assorted influencers and livestreamers using Frankfurt’s unique backdrop for clout, and the admittedly very run-down junkies and homeless at every corner.
What a picture to behold.
Also, somehow the city really shone in the photos I took, much more than IRL, so don’t be fooled.
I suppose my phone camera has been optimized for capturing a good skyline.
All over all, I give Frankfurt a 2.5/10 as far as German cities go and wouldn’t recommend the longest stay there if you can avoid it.
Germany has simply much more to offer.
Hotel Room Brainrot
Returning to our hotel room is where the real fun started.
Have you ever opened YouTube on a new device with an untrained algorithm that just vaguely shows what generally somehow is trending in the rough area?
Well yea.
That’s what we did to the poor hotel room TV.
And we had an absolute blast.
Having entered a very liminal headspace brought on by our skurrile experience of the city prior, our capacities for brainrot were susceptible.
And boi, we were not disappointed.
I’m not exactly sure what this algorithm was recommending and where it was centered on, but I think Frankfurt folks might just have absolute peak taste in brainrot.
The array of animal video tier lists, AI slop, double-screen skit and satisfying video content, and last but not least, a strange genre of Chinese meme - I don’t know how to describe this - skit-overacting-expression humor bordered on absurdist pieces or straight-up dadaism.
And we laughed rolling on the ground.
Before we knew it, we had watched two hours’ worth of random German algorithm YouTube Shorts and it was most certainly time for bed.
What ensued was a night of mediocre at best, nonexistent more realistically, hotel-room bunk sleep.
The next morning, everyone but our usually notorious insomniac was trashed, and we committed the sin of having room-temperature energy drinks before breakfast.
We then made our way to exactly catch a two-hour-late train to Wiesbaden, where our con would be held.
It was the only train that would go for a while, so we were considerably lucky.
This event, however, kicked off a DB day that easily lands in my top 200 worst DB experiences.
Yes, that’s still extremely high up in the list.
The list is just very long.
Then - Finally - The Actual Con!
I’d like to section this part into relevant happenings. It’s just too much rambling otherwise.
So here goes.
Arrival: The Soda Can Employee Incident
Immediately when we left the considerably more cleanly Wiesbaden station, we were met with stunningly lovely crowds of phenomenal cosplayers and con-goers.
Sometimes you arrive near a destination and all you need to do to complete the last part of your journey is just let happen and drift along with the folks who are obviously headed in the same direction.
Thus, following a brief pitstop to groggily appreciate the lounging ducks ’n pigeons on the grass, we finally arrived.
Btw, here’s a tip:
Don’t take the entrance closest to the station.
There will be less busy entrances to most cons if you take the time to round a building.
At the main entrance right around the corner, we didn’t even need to line up.
Overjoyed, we all rushed in, confused about where to show the tickets and who to give the bag to. I immediately switched the order up and ended in a moment of confusion.
Meanwhile, my partner, who was then carrying the crew’s main bag, got held up at bag checking for the crime of…
Energy drink.
I have nooo idea how an energy drink is considered a health hazard, yet somehow they skipped our plastic and metal bottles entirely, got hung up on that energy drink, and the two of us left the con (thankfully being reminded to check out our tickets or we wouldn’t get back in again) and had a lovely two-minute energy-drink gulp-down contest.
Once we were in the clear, we finally entered the con and found our left-alone friend guy who’d gone in first in the entryway, merrily explaining to the third stranger who mistook him for staff where the hall plans were.
Seems he already had his own adventure.
Part Two: Enthralled by the Artistes… and Food
.f66ebf1f8c2cf5cf.webp)
At the location, all of us agreed that it was a bad idea to come to the con on an empty stomach.
We had no intention to further any energy-drink-induced stomach aches by staying hungry, so food stalls it was.
(Portmonaie status: tremors of fear.)
The selection of mostly Japanese street foods was good but slightly repetitive.
And pricey.
Veeery pricey.
Which is okay if you just want the experience of a new snack, but not great if it has to sustain you for a whole day.
I ended up sharing a variety with my friend that was actually pretty great.
I simply can’t say anything bad about well-fried carbs tastewise…
Like ever.
Strengthened and with fresh vigor - the first breach to our wallets had been committed anyways - we were ready for some art.
Normally, an artist alley is the bane of my financial planning for an entire month.
This time, I had planned my budget out beforehand.
Everything that I could realistically use (instead of tons of prints I have no wall space for) was written down on little envelopes in my wallet.
There sat the budget for the category.
While a generous budget, it really kept me from overspending and entering my usual senseless artist alley craze that leaves me broke for weeks.
I do recommend you try this if you struggle with impulse buying at cons.
The selection of artists was good, and I was especially astounded by the variety of products that were offered in an imprinted, customized way.
I would have never thought of glasses-cleaning tissues with prints on them!
Part Three: Into the Back(Con)rooms
This is where it got real hazy for me.
Already overstimulated by noisy and cramped artist alleyways, I now also had to deal with enormous fatigue, my comrades no better off.
On top of that, we also had to eventually navigate the con to find our way to things we wanted to see.
The ensuing scene could best be described with one of those montages of cartoon characters walking up and down stairs and running around opening doors at random.
Finally, we did find some lovely activities to do, took pictures with cosplayers and of ourselves in those cool photo-shoot rooms, visited an amazing talk on cosplay around the world (the lady holding it was an absolute sweetheart!) and also tried out a card game in one of the many game rooms.
It was a kind of social-deduction-poker-esque kind of game that required a fair bit of brainpower, tbh.
Thus naturally, I was the first out.
The remaining two, however, did have such a fierce and intense duel of mental capacities that it even drew the attention of one of the game organizers, who joined the table to have a good look at the outcome.
The moment ended up cracking all of us up, and we even got a hilarious animation from my friend out of it. If you like his animation, check out his IG for more of his artwork!: https://www.instagram.com/shadowliiii3/
Lastly, Our Journey Home
There came a time when our little troupe got so intensely brain-fried, overstimulated, exhausted and braindead that we were somewhat relieved to finally call it a day and leave the con halls.
When we stepped outside, an absolute wonderland of cosplayer groups and photographers was presented to us.
There must have been thousands, honestly.
To a first-time big-con goer, this was a tremendously impressive sight.
Through the masses, we made our way down to the station.
Or, as I’d like to call it:
Harbinger of Bad News!
Well well well.
If the worst part of our train journey wasn’t just waiting for us…
After all the trains going from this particular station were cancelled, we had to wait ages for an ominous bus, of which neither of us knew if it would come and, if so, where.
Somehow, miraculously, we got on it and drove well over an hour to a station in the absolute middle of nowhere.
Well, not exactly nothing.
There definitely was a roadblock for some kind of parade we had to drive around, leading to us missing the connecting train and rendering us stranded at this nowhere-station place.
Luckily, snacks saved the day.
We took the hour waiting as a sign to have a long and indeed extremely crusty station dinner.
At least the regional train we took to our main station was perfectly on time.
Same thing cannot be said about our ICE.
First thing we knew was a 130-minute delay on the train to Munich.
Second thing we knew was: we’d be taking an earlier train that itself was already so late, it would come after the time we had scheduled our original ride.
On the train, we got our fourth and at least last unpleasant surprise of the day:
Drunk football fans.
Thanos meme:
Finally, we have them all.
We experienced the full spectrum of nightmare co-passengers on our brief trip to Conichi Wiesbaden, and I have absolutely no intentions of ever repeating it.
Con was nice tho.